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it's NOT about You!!!

 If you’ve given a speech or presentation, you understand how tough it can be to focus on what you want to share with your audience. Sometimes we get caught up in our “performance” that we get nervous, forget our material and struggle to finish. Here’s a tip: Take the focus off of what you are doing (speaking) and transfer it to your audience (are they getting your information/message); this   change of focus  will allow you to contribute to the greater good of sharing knowledge and experience. Of course you want to have effective speaking skills so you are confident and knowledgeable. However, remember why you are speaking. Is it to inform? Educate? Persuade? or Entertain? Add some humor, interesting personal stories relating to your message, good body language and gestures along with passion for what you enjoy, will enhance your overall effectiveness. Read your audience as you speak so that you can make changes as you go to ensure they are “still engaged” and haven’t fallen asleep! G
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Good Manners are a Must!!!!

  “Good manners and proper etiquette are at the very core of how we communicate with one another,” says Denise Dinyon, Lenox gift-giving and etiquette expert. “We need to develop and reinforce those essential courtesies that make our relationships strong, valuable and long-lasting.” She offers the following etiquette tips, which are easy to incorporate into everyday life: 1. Turn the cell phone off  -- completely -- during a luncheon meeting, social function, or on public transportation. 2. Hold the door -- whether male or female, hold open a door you have just passed through for the person behind you. 3. Bring a gift for the hostess -- preferably one that doesn’t require her to drop everything she is doing. 4. Keep to the right -- on the sidewalk, in stairwells. 5. Say please and thank you -- to waiters, flight attendants, store clerks, cab drivers -- the little things go a long way. 6. Circulate at a party or social gathering -- whether hostess or guest, the people, not the fo
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Confidence Leads the Way!

  Dictionary.com defines confidence as the belief in oneself and one's powers or abilities. Have you ever come across these types of situations: • Your supervisor is on vacation and upper management is asking you for an update on a project, right now! • You are starting your own business and need to talk to a bank about a small business loan today! • You have been assigned to train fellow employees on new safety rules at several plant locations within the month! • You have an idea for a new invention and need to sell your idea quickly! • You want to join a community group today but you don’t know any members. • You have several job interviews this week to market your skills. • Your favorite cause has asked you to take the lead on a huge fundraiser now! As you read the above "real-world" opportunities, did you smile knowing you could handle these situations? Or, did your heart start pounding, knees get weak or your mind go blank? Confidence is that “stable rock” inside you
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Who is a Leader? You Are!

I used to think a leader was the “big cheese” in the corner office, a Boy Scout Troop Leader or the person down the street who owned a business. Early in my career, I had several supervisors who were “leaders” by their position; however, they certainly didn’t lead “me” in a way that promoted my growth and success!   Did I ever see myself as a leader? No! Why? It was me who labeled myself as a “follower." The generic job titles that I was placed in, regardless of the experience and skill set I had to offer, didn’t help my thought process either. It wasn’t until many years later when I worked with a supervisor who truly changed my mindset to believe that I was a leader and gave me courage to change the course of my career path! When I joined Toastmasters, I jumped right in to serve in leadership roles which gave me even more experience and knowledge to pursue exciting challenges in Toastmasters and my community. Do people ask your opinions about certain topics? Do you step out and v
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Stop Using Pause Fillers!

A few years ago, I attended a lunch meeting hosted by an organization to promote their next charitable event. I looked forward to learning more about the organization and hearing their speaker provide a bit of history and details to peak my interest in their fundraising efforts. I settled in my chair, turned up my ears and waited patiently for the speaker.    After he was introduced, and began speaking, I had a bad feeling. The feeling was similar to being told that your favorite ice cream has been discontinued; a big disappointment!    What happened?      The speaker, who I am sure was knowledgeable and experienced, filled his speech with so many “pause fillers” that I had difficulty understanding what he was saying. He began the majority of his sentences with a long “Uh” and added other distracting words in his sentences.      His 20-minute presentation seemed like hours and it became uncomfortable to listen to him speak. As a  “long-time” Toastmaster, I know the importance of reduci
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SELF CONFIDENCE IS VITAL TO SUCCESS!

What does it take to be an effective communicator? First of all, you must gain confidence in order to tackle improving your skills and getting your message out to an audience.    Your audience can be another person, your supervisor, a small group of members in an organization or a huge crowd at a conference. Confidence allows you to “be yourself” and not fret over your perceived imperfections.    Every speaker has areas that they are not their best; however, knowing that you can get through whatever happens, makes them a better communicator.   Years ago, I never thought I’d be standing in front of 100+ audience members to deliver a speech or workshop; many of them for 30+ minutes.    It took time for me to gain the confidence I needed to pursue speaking opportunities; however, I learned from feedback and pushed myself to enhance my skills.    As a long-time Mentor, my initial advice is to take baby steps to feel better about speaking in front of other people.    Take opportuni
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LEAD WITH YOUR HEART!

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”    John Quincy Adams Leadership is about helping others achieve goals through guidance and sharing our experience. However, many people take leadership too far and turn it into chaos when they want to take over and not confer with their team. Great leaders motivate by inspiration; by being the 'cheerleader' of the team. They set a vision of how they believe a dream can be a reality. They also know their own strengths and weaknesses and look for team members to fill the gap of their knowledge and experience.  Enable others to act on what they have to share. When the team wins; the leader wins. A leader can be CEO of a company, the Executive Director of a non-profit organization OR can be the first-year employee in charge of changing procedures that have been in place for years. It is how you direct others in a positive way to get the job done. Remember,
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